WARNING!! Gross post ahead! If you are squeemish, run, run away fast!

So you have seen those comercials about colon cleansing? No? What the hell? Don't you watch TV?
Ok, well, these things claim (even Dr. Oz says) that taking these products will remove 5-8lbs of um... 'stuff' from your intestines, and get rid of the bloated look (like the one that caused a co-worker to ask me yesterday if I had a bun in the oven). Having IBS makes me think that there ain't much in there to start with, but since I am all about a shortcut to drop this weight, I have been on this stuff for about a week now. Nothing. Well, I mean nothing new. I am waiting for the 8 pound turd to arrive and make it so I don't have to actually stop eating or drinking booze to lose some weight. TMI you say? Too bad. Get over it, and pray for the mother load for me k?
I have decided to go back to walking alot. I talked to my surgeon yesterday and we came to the conclusion that the risk of fucking up my hip by exercising, and needing a total hip replacement was better than me hanging on to this extra 25 lbs and needing both a new hip and having heart problems etc. from being chubby. The problem with this plan? It hurts like hell to walk. Last night I took the dog on a monster walk, like the ones we used to go on before the hip issue. The dog has not been getting long walks since I got hurt because although my lovely partner has walked her 3 times a day with out complaint, they have been fairly short walks as my partner 'doesn't do outside'. Yeah, you heard me. There are bugs and dirt outside (at lwast where we live in the almost burbs). She's from the Bronx. If you know anybody from the Bronx you'll know what I am saying. If there is grass in the yard, you are 'in the wilds'! Did you know that in the Bronx they pave over any grass in the yard with.. get this...GREEN CEMENT!!!!!! So anyway, back to the monster walk. By the time we were 30 minutes from the house, the dog and I were ready to draw straws on who was going to carry who back to the house. She won.